February 2012
10 posts
“Can I have half and half instead of cream? I hate cream.”
– Customer
A lady pulled up to drive through yesterday and was on her phone. She handed me her card to pay and said whispering “I’m on a conference call.”
Da fuck lady. No.
4 people
I told a woman yesterday “Excuse me, but I can’t have you going table to table to solicit and sell things. We are a restaurant and can’t have this.”
“What? I can’t just give them information?”
“No.” and I wanted to add that especially not when you’re telling people about a weight loss solution that works when it obviously does nothing...
I have shit to do
No sir, I am not going to stand still for one moment on this busy Sunday. My back is already turned to you as I finish making this smoothie. Let that be a hint. So don’t just yell
“Ma’am. Ma’am. Ma’am. Excuse me. Miss.”
at me. Let that also give you an idea that No. I can not watch your Ipad sit at the counter while you disappear for an undisclosed amount of...
assortedmisanthropy:
If you don’t know what you want- don’t go through the drive-through. I don’t want to listen to you go “Uhhhhmm.. Uhmmmm…Uhhhh” You sound like a retarded zombie.
Me: It'll be 13.86
Customer: Can I pay for this in three separate transactions?
Me: If you want to be difficult.
To the lady who demanded eight raw sugars in her...
myleswillsaveus:
…what the hell is wrong with you?
January 2012
23 posts
So I made my customer's usual drink as she walked...
beahomebody:
AND I GOT BITCHED AT BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO ~get her and her significant other’s drink at the same time~. Oh yeah, and I also prepared her usual shot of sugar free vanilla syrup, plate, and butter knife along with her drink. Nope, in return she bitches at me. She complained to me saying, “CAN YOU JUST WAIT UNTIL I ORDER FIRST?” -_- really bro? i would be SO HAPPY if someone made my...
customer : can i get a grande shaken iced tea lemonade?
me : sure! what kind of tea would you like?
customer : no!
I was on my break!
So, I work at possibly one of the smallest Starbucks in my city. This can lead to numerous people having to stand around as they wait for others to leave.
A couple days ago, we had this very situation happening when a couple decided to get up and leave. Not only did they leave their cups, but they left a mess of muffin remains and napkins everywhere. Not paid to wait tables (and on my lunch...
Not all those who wander are lost: My job →
cute-exsplosion:
I normally don’t do text posts, but today I really need to rant.
I’m currently 18 years old and I work as a Barista. I don’t have the pleasure to work in cafe or a Starbucks. I work in small drive up building basically a kitchen you can order coffee from. My job is easy as far as making coffee goes and cleaning. What I cannot stand are the rude people I have to deal with day...
I can't be on the register anymore
Customer: What kind of hot chocolates do you have?
Me: Excuse me?
Customer: ….
Me: Uhh. The kind made with chocolate.
Customer: Oh, see, sometimes I’ll go places and they’ll have different types and….
Where the fuck are you going?
I quit. I can’t do this anymore. Done.
Yaknow. It's like, above Earl Grey and next to...
Customer: All day breakfast. So tell me, what does that consist of?
Me: Excuse me?
Customer: What is it?
Me: (I turn around and look up at our menu board) Uhh… Well. It’s a tea sir.
Customer: What?
Me: It’s a black tea. I don’t know. What do you want from me?
Customer: So I take it that you actually don’t serve breakfast then?
Me: What? Oh. Uhh.. Yeah. We do.
...
Oh Those Friday Nights...
Don’t you just love it when drunk 20 year olds order through drive thru late at night and try to troll you?
“Uhh… yeah. Can I have a hot chocolate? And with extra vanilla in it?”
“Sir. I can not. Because we do not put vanilla in our hot chocolates. We use CHOCOLATE.”
This shit gets old.
I made a bacon sandwich and a reduced fat turkey bacon sandwich for a couple that had never tried Starbucks bfast sandwiches before, and as I was bagging them the woman goes: “Um-how will we be able to tell which one is which?”
No problem-legimate question as they are both bacon, egg, and cheese and they were admittedly new to our food. “The regular bacon is on a ciabatta bread...
You come here almost every day...
Yes ma’m-your
decaf tall half-pump mocha (make sure to “sub” it-they don’t charge me!!!) non-fat no whip no foam extra hot 2 splenda latte
has to be entered into my register as just that. I do not happen to have your drink memorized yet as I am still fairly new to this store and I cannot read your mind. Just because my barista on bar knows it from working here for so long...
My Favorite Question.
Me: I have a venti caramel frappuccino at the bar! Customer: Is this mine? Me: Did you have a venti caramel frappuccino? Customer: No, I had a tall coffee. Me: Then no, this huge frozen drink is not your small hot coffee. Customer: *gasp*
ericbohn asked: Hahahahaha! Expresso...
Silly teenagers...
Believe me, not one person behind the counter believes you are cool for ordering an upside down caramel macchiato. We all know you are buying a glorified latte.
I legitimately had someone order one of these and all her little friends were amazed and in awe by how awesome it sounded and each one proceeded to order the exact same thing. They really did believe they were special since they...
billcotter:
If you order a handmade drink and don’t leave any kind of tip I automatically think you’re a fucking asshole. Also, don’t tell me that you’re a barista, pay me all in change, then not tip me. You fucking prick.
When someone asks for "that drink that comes with...
yonosenada:
….. shoot yourself or never come again.
"Cappucino with no foam please"
sometimes i think to myself that i can no longer...
and then there’s a day like today.
a guy comes in 10 minutes before i close, watches me break down the espresso machine, and once i’ve set everything down to ask him what i can get for him he asks for a large cappuccino.
bruh, where the fuck do you think espresso comes from?
Dear Customers,
rlunny:
Please don’t try to talk to me while I’m steaming milk. It’s very loud and I can’t hear you.
Love, Your Barista
December 2011
36 posts
Dear people of the world:
Don’t buy someone a gift card to a coffee shop when they don’t drink coffee.
It makes my life more difficult than it already is.
Remember next time you're in Starbucks, if you are...
the "surprise me" customer
Fuck New Years Resolutions
Come on. Be serious. You’re going to drop it in a month. So stop asking me “What flavors are sugar free?”
“Can that be skinny?”
“Are any of these muffins low calories?”
Cuz I’ll tell you. We have bottled water over there and bananas, apples, and oranges. If that’s not appetizing to you, have fun with your attempt at a diet.
A woman yesterday asked for a 2 shot Americano in a medium cup. And then asked me to fill it only half way with water.
I almost wanted to tell her “no. But I can put it in a small cup that would be the same size.” but I didn’t.
Because as soon as I gave it to her, I knew exactly what she was going to do.
dump the whole pitcher of 2% in her drink to fill it up and make it a...
: Medium espresso, fill the cup with milk. →
zombiekarah:
Customer: Excuse me, can I have a medium espresso in a small cup?
My manager: So you want two shots of espresso in a small cup?
Customer: Yes!
Manager: You know that’s just two shots of straight espresso, right? Is that what you want?
Customer: Yes, that’s what I want.
Manager: Would you like any cream in that?
Customer: Just a little milk
Me: /makes medium espresso with a...
Last night was "Christmas Eve" Eve.
It was slow, and we were all anxious to leave.
Around an hour before close or so, three girls about college age came in.
The first girl orders her drink and is asked to sign the receipt. She looks up at her friends and mouths the word “tip?”
to which they shook their head ‘no’.
That was really lame.
truth is trickiest: Do Not Ask Your Barista if... →
misstristin:
Do not ask your barista if your drink is really nonfat. It is usually made correctly. Unless you have reason to believe that a mistake was made, you should not ask your barista to confirm your drink all over again. She is greatly annoyed by your doubt in her abilities. And anyway, two percent…
There’s a lot here, but a good read.
thanks for the tip: Tall glass of espresso →
annoyingbeasties:
Customer: “Can I have a tall espresso shot? Like, a big one?”
Me: “So, would you like an Americano? Or a latte? Or, like, several shots?”
Customer: “Yeah.”
Me: “Uhm, which one?”
Customer: “Whatever, a big espresso.”
Me: “Sir, that’s not a real drink. Do you want water with your espresso, or a double, or a latte?”
Customer: “Yeah.”
Me: “That was three questions.”
...
Lil Ol Lady: Do you have 1%?
Me: Sorry, we have skim or 2%.
LOL: Oh. That's fine.
Me: So, skim or 2%?
LOL: Yes. That's okay.
Me: .....
Dude guys. This shouldn't be so difficult
Barista: Did you get your muffin?
Customer: yeah. peach cobbler muffin.
Barista: no. did you get your muffin yet?
Customer: oh. no.
You're working??
annoyingbeasties:
Customer: “You’re working today?? On a Sunday? That’s terrible.”
Me: “Yeah, I don’t like it either. That’ll be $11.75, please.”
Customer: “Terrible. You shouldn’t have to work on Sundays!”
Me: “Mmhmm, someone has to be here to ring you up, right?”
Customer: “…”
Yes. Put that in your privileged pipe and smoke it. Smoke it good and hard.
follow the white russian.: barista blog entry →
merkovski:
Long order.
So this douche-clown came in last night and ordered 16 extra-picky drinks, right? He pays for each one as a separate transaction, and tips 42 cents.
The whole time he’s standing there ordering like:
“The next one…is a venti…white mocha frap light…extra ice, extra shot….and blended twice…and the name is Caroline..*hands me money, I give him the change*…The next...
Rant
bloodstreamm:
People who come to Starbucks, get a cold drink, & then complain about how cold it is. What the literal fuck is wrong with you?
